Rio finally remembers his appointment with the urine extractors

We ask the people who really matter – the fans – about their club’s prospects for the season ahead. Here Chris Shaw hopes that Man U’s new number one has packed his long-johns and claims they might already have a pretender to Paul Scholes’s crown…as long as he keeps out of prison!

How long do you think Ferguson will go on as gaffer?


Two, maybe three years.

What would you consider a successful season this year?


Defending the league title would be good enough for me, but obviously adding the Champions League would put the icing on the cake. Although that depends on Barcelona having a load of injuries or an off day.

Already United have been busy in the transfer window but have yet to sign a replacement for Scholes. Who would you personally like to see brought in for that role?


I would have liked Modric as I could see him fitting into the team well but he seems to prefer Chelsea if he is going to move. Other than Modric, it would be Wesley Sneijder. I’m not a huge fan of his by any means but I don’t really see any other high quality options available.

Are you happy with the singings made so far?

I can’t say that I’m overly excited by any of them, not like I was when we signed Cantona or Rooney for example. Obviously, Phil Jones has potential to be a top defender but that’s all it is at the moment….potential. I do like Ashley Young but can’t see him improving the team that much and the keeper looks very promising but I do fear for a young keeper coming from sunnier climes to our climate when the cold, dark, wet winter days start coming in. If he can stick the foreign country and climate then he could turn out to be a world class keeper.

United have got another batch of promising youngster coming through. How excited are you about the prospects of Morrison etc?


I am quite excited by Morrison and Pogba, although the former needs to keep out of trouble with the law or he’s going to be no good to us if he’s locked up! With the trouble we are having finding a replacement for Scholes, we may already have an ideal candidate in Morrision at the club.

Fans of other teams always seem to think that referees favour us more often than not.

In your opinion can the returning loanees Wellbeck and Cleverley make any real impact this season?


I can’t see it myself. Although both made a good impact on loan last season, I can’t see them getting enough playing time to have any real impact unless they come in and do extremely well in the first 2 or 3 games they get.

What one change would you like to see Ferguson implement on the pitch from last year?


Can’t really think of anything major. Maybe play 3 up front at home this season against weaker teams as we seem to have a lot of forwards back for this season. Although saying that, we won 18 out of 19 home games last season. Maybe instead, I should make that be more adventurous away from home as our away record was so poor and we only won 5 away league games. So attack more away from home!

Who would you like the see shown the exit door?


Bebe, Obertan and Evans because he had a poor season. Must say that I was disappointed that O’ Shea left as he has been a great servant over the years and provided good cover in many positions. He wasn’t the best but he was a good option to have in reserve.

Are there any misconceptions from the media/other fans about your club that you’d like to put right here?


That fans of other teams always seem to think that referees favour us more often than not. Quite often, refs seem to be biased against us, probably because they get stick if they give us anything so they like pens to be stonewallers. Just checked out the stats for last 11 seasons (as that was readily available on a website) and we have been awarded same number of pens as Liverpool and less than Chelsea and Arsenal. As we have won the league 6 times in those 11 seasons, it doesn’t seem to stack up that we’d get fewer pens than Arsenal and Chelsea if all was fair.

Also, many fans think that we get a good deal from the FA when we get royally screwed by the FA. They like to make an example of us as we are the highest profile club. For example, the Ferdinand missed drugs test incident where he got a longer ban than other players got for testing positive like Mutu and Bosnich at Chelsea. Also, Rooney swears at the camera last season and gets a two game ban. Season before, Stevie G flicks the Vs up at camera and doesn’t even get a warning.