In light of the news that Partick Thistle manager Jackie McNamara has written a sitcom called ‘The Therapy Room’ we look at eight classics of the genre we’d quite like to see remade with a football twist.
Only Fools And Horses
A remake set in and around White Hart Lane last season. Renowned wheeler-dealer Harry Redknapp plays Del Boy, Peter Crouch is his put-upon younger brother whilst there is a guest slot for wrinkly-faced codger Teddy Sheringham as Grandad.
The series ends with Spurs losing out on a Champion’s League place thanks to a comical own-goal at the Etihad. The camera pans to Redknapp who puffs on his cigar for a bit of dramatic suspense before saying the line every viewer is waiting for – ‘You plonker Crouchy’.
The Dustbinmen
Neville Southall and Steve Claridge and their adventures on the carts.
Robin’s Nest
In an upmarket remake of the classic 70’s series Arsenal’s Dutch centre-forward opens up a swanky restaurant in the west-end. The hapless one-handed pot-washer is played by Manuel Almunia.
Only When I Laugh
Darren Anderton, Jonathan Woodgate and Kieran Dyer get up to various japes and capers in the treatment room of an anonymous club. In a contentious bit of casting the Indian doctor is played by the victim of Woodgate’s savage street attack in 2000.
Rab C. Nesbitt
Slur Alex Ferguson takes on the iconic role immortalised by Gregor Fisher. He duly wins a BAFTA for a ‘shockingly realistic portrayal of a Scotish pisshead tramp’.
‘His dedication to the project was second to none’, marvelled the show’s executive producer. ‘He even brought his own clothes and booze and remained in character throughout shooting’.
Citizen Smith
‘Wolfie’ Barton takes to Twitter and tries to bring down the government, to the hilarity of the British public.
Just Good Friends
Starring John O’Shea and Matt Taylor. The Sunderland utility man strikes up a long-running sweet-natured bromance with Bolton’s Taylor.
Going Straight
O’Shea again in a spin-off from the above. The United reject marries and settles down. Hardly anyone watches it even when they change the title to Keeping Up Appearances.
