“Oi Sergio lad, buck your ideas up or I’ll sub you for Benson and Hedges”

Mike Devlin rakes through the ashes in what was ultimately a disappointing season for Manchester City.

How did your club fare compared to your pre-season hopes/expectation?

Sort of how I expected. The OCDs amongst us will be no doubt be happy with 1, 2, 1, 2, but perhaps we could have given a little more in the domestic cups. Like a damn, perhaps.

2014/15 highlight

Knowing I was right about my expectations.

Season’s low point

Knowing I was right about my expectations.

Player of the year

The easy option would be to say Agüero; he did get the Golden Boot thingy after all, so I am not going to say him. Instead I will go with Mangala.

Too many Blues saw his price tag and half expected Messi like capabilities; few ignored the fee, unwilling to see the potential, or a young lad in a foreign league, and were not willing to give him time.

Shame on you.

Was there a particular goal/moment that got you out of your seat?

Lampard versus Chelsea was epic. Ultimately didn’t change the league at all, and to their credit the Chelsea fans applauded him at the end, but it was rather amusing.

Player you’d be happiest see leave this summer

Yaya so we can get shut of his agent?

Boyata so he can at least play some football somewhere?

No, I go with Clichy (who I would have picked last season), for admitting to laying down tools under Mancini. You will never be a Blue, in my eyes.

Go to your room Gael. Actually no, just go.

Want your manager to still be in charge next term?

Irrespective of what I think, he will remain. Although I would ask him why he was asked to get 5 trophies in 5 years on a 3 year contract, something he actually agreed to do. His maths skills are hopeless.

You can go back in time and offer the gaffer one bit of advice prior to the season just gone based on what you know is to come. What would it be?

I appreciate you are in England and that you are doing your best to fit in, but one does not ever go full Mike Bassett.


Just don’t.

Which opposing player received the loudest boos and which opposing player impressed you the most?

Is it too easy to say “Rooney”? It is, isn’t it? Okay, not him.

Barton wasn’t boo’d enough though – that fella should be boo’d for buying groceries, or simply getting up out of bed.

Robben is also too easy to boo at.

So I will go with referee, Tasos Sidiropolous in the CL match vs CSKA, basically because he was a useless twat.

As for the opposite end of the spectrum I have to give it to Hazard. If only you and your agent were not greedy bastards you could have been wearing the correct shade of blue.

If at all, how did the media’s portrayal of your club in 2014/15 differ from the reality?

As per usual, too much shoddy reporting-by-numbers. Many Blues get upset at the slightest little things, so they really need to stop that and remember how bad it used to be (when they barely reported on us at all). If you don’t know how bad it was, then buy my book. Then cry a lot.

I do not mind negative reporting if it has something worthwhile to say but at times the media were looking for shit in a rose garden (I appreciate roses grow exceptionally well in shit). See what we see – minus Blue-tinted glasses – and just report. It’s not difficult … well, okay, maybe for the media it is.

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