by Ste | Aug 31, 2011 | Fake News
The world yesterday jolted on its axis as Owen Hargreaves passed a medical examination. The Cutter has uncovered the private notes later jotted down by the doctor involved in the baffling miracle that sadly prompted several wheelchair-bound disables to rise from their...
by Ste | Aug 25, 2011 | Fake News
Senior representatives from each club in the Scottish Premier League were last night locked in talks with the SFA over forming their own version of a European tournament. A key condition of the event is that no foreign clubs will be permitted to enter it and ruin...
by Ste | Aug 16, 2011 | Fake News
It has come to our attention that the Isle of Man will put forward a proposal to provide a Premier League outfit by the beginning of the 2012-13 season. The Cutter’s sources have revealed that discussions are currently at an advanced stage with Premier League bigwigs...
by Ste | Aug 14, 2011 | Fake News
The Cutter has gained exclusive access inside Joey Barton’s persecution complex, a sprawling, previously-unseen compound that is situated at a top secret location somewhere in the North-East. For years now people have been speculating about the very existence of the...
by Ste | Aug 10, 2011 | Best of the Cutter, Fake News
Word reaches the Cutter that ‘Big’ Sam Allardyce is assembling a vigilante squad of managers to take down the London rioters Old Skool-style this evening. Bosses of several leading clubs are so aggrieved at the threat of this weekend’s fixtures being postponed that...
by Ste | Aug 5, 2011 | Fake News
British Rail have revised their train schedules ahead of this Sunday’s Community Shield clash at Wembley between United and City after blundering so spectacularly with the corresponding fixture in the FA Cup semi-final last April. Then the company laid on additional...
